Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Isotopes in the air.

I dunno why I thought my day was going to get better than the elevator ride to my floor.

I get on the elevator this morning, bright and early at 6:20. A man with a dolly, loaded with two metal ( lead) boxes gets on with about 10 or so elderly people and a woman from our admissions department leading them to the same-day surgery floor.

side note: as I re-tell this story to my co-workers, Mary Anne says "the guy had a baby dolly??" No, a pully thing for dragging heavy shit here and there. See? Where I work a man carrying a "baby dolly" would not be too weird or strange. It would just make a really good story.

So anyway, we get to the 3rd floor and the guy says ( VERY loudly) "Coming through! This stuff has to get off! RADIOACTIVE. Radioactive coming through" He moves through us, all packed asshole to bellybutton with no room to spare. I reach through two people and hold the "Door Open" button for the guy. He proceeds to say again "RADIOACTIVE. On your legs there, radioactive!!"


No we use dyes and such that are marked with VERY low levels of radiation all the time in certain patient tests. Pretty common. And these were in lead lined boxes. Give me a freakin' break. Someone has some overblown either fear of the job or sense of importance. Good lord, there is NO reason to say "RADIOACTIVE" at the top of your lungs 15 times and scared a bunch of poor old people.

As the door close one man turns to me and says " Would have been nice if maybe he told us before we were all smack up against that stuff!" Good point, sir and why are your eyelashes glowing??


So I punch the button for my unit and as I walk though the double doors I say to the bunch of nurses standing there "You do know this place in an insane asylum, right?"

My friend Laurie looks up and says "Yeah, and she has only been here 20 seconds. Baby, give it time. It grows on you. Just like mold"

I bet a little radiation would kill that mold. Or was that make it stronger? I forget.


Jennifer said...

GEES! What an idiot!

As always though, your stories make me laugh.

Pete Dunn said...

Maybe he was bringing it here to Utah. Cause that's where the whole world brings that shit to dump it. The Indian reservations here make their money that way because, in Utah, gambling is evil and wicked. Radioactive waste by the trainload is obviously much better.

Robin L said...

Good grief! Good thing no one had a heart attack!

robin bird said...

you are the best teller of crazy hospital stories heidi! i hope you are writing these down in your journal somewhere...oh i guess that is what this is... sheesh you gotta feel sorry for those folks over in utah (per pete dunn) , i never knew why it was that their mustaches and eyelashes were glowing... you are so educational!